I’m really struggling lately. My beautiful, wonderful, “happiest I’ve ever been in my life” relationship ENDED – harshly, abruptly, and without any real reason.
I’ve been sitting here for weeks on end with a beautiful diamond ring and a head full of WTF?! I don’t even know how to resolve that in my mind…
You were all so kind, and excited for me, when I told you about the engagement – literally just a few short weeks before it ended. 😐 Thank you for that. And for your kind words when it did end. This has been a really (REALLY) hard time.
So what’s a low carb girl to do?
Crawl in bed and eat ice cream, right?
That does seem like the logical answer, doesn’t it? 😛 *sigh* I didn’t though. And I haven’t – and I won’t. As much as I would like to. Instead I’ve been really pushing myself, forcing myself, in a more positive direction.
I’m exercising like a mad woman (I *am* a mad woman), I’ve been getting out and doing new things (feel like it or NOT), and I am eating super healthy – even if I have to force myself to eat. Mostly I’m going through all those motions totally zoned out in a zombie-like state, but that’s okay. It’s better than coming out of this on the other side (someday?) thirty pounds heavier and that much more miserable…
I’m an emotional eater by the way, so this has been especially tough. When I can’t take it anymore (at least once a day), I get up and go pound out 3 miles in 30 short minutes. It’s that or the ice cream. Or worse – like throwing things. 😛
I’m proud of myself. I’m doing all the right things, even if my heart and head aren’t totally into it – I’m doing it anyway. I’ll look back and thank myself for this, I’m sure.
Yesterday was a tough day. One of many. I got up and ate some leftover grilled chicken (zero carbs) then went and had a pedicure. After that I drove into the city and had dinner with a friend.
We ate at Frothy Monkey in downtown Nashville. I had a “build your own salad” and chose fresh spinach with grilled chicken, feta cheese, walnuts, cucumber, avocado and strawberries:
I pulled the strawberries off to the side and ate those for dessert. 🙂 It was a great salad. I was just happy I ate a full meal, and something green. My poor friend- I wasn’t the best company (ack!). That’s a true friend for you, though. She didn’t seem to mind (much) that I stared off into space a lot and wasn’t much fun.
After dinner we went to a book signing event at the Nashville Public Library. The author is Jenny Lawson, a popular blogger that goes by “The Blogess”. She talked about anxiety and depression, and how it’s affected her life. She was hilarious. 🙂 A very serious topic yes, but her delivery made you laugh hysterically… and want to cry, all at the same time.
I bought both of her books while we were there:
Something new to read will do me good.
I had a coffee on the drive home, then stopped at a McDonald’s and bought three sausage patties. Thank goodness for their “all hours breakfast” now! I couldn’t finish all three, but I knew I needed something else on my stomach before I went to bed.
Here’s how my carbs & macronutrients worked out for the day:
Only 14 net carbs. 5,456 steps on my Fitbit. A good day, even on a bad day. I fell asleep tired and sad, and woke up the same way. Hello to another day. One foot in front of the other, with healthy meals and exercise in between…